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Avoiding Divorce: 101. For Black Men. vol. 1

Amazon Customer

5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome Read

Reviewed in the United States on July 8, 2020

Verified Purchase

This is an awesome read a must-have book for an African American male. This book will give him insight on the discussions that women have with each other about what is lacking in our marriages and dating life especially in this day and age. This author hit the nail on the head when it came to how women feel and what we need from the men in our lives. I will be passing this book along to my son.

Lisa Garnett

5.0 out of 5 stars Sir Are you listening? How to Avoid Divorce 101

Reviewed in the United States on April 29, 2024

I finally finished the book. It took me a minute to get to it but I couldn't put it down. It was definitely a page turner.

The pure brilliance of the book is the simplicity of the actions. Understandably we were conditioned to avoid these interactions, yet I think it's really simple. I appreciated the candor; most of what I can relate too.

I can relate to the disconnect I experienced with my ex-husband due to his inability or selfishness just to listen to my day. Give me a kind word. Simply treat me like a lady; a woman worthy to be loved. My reactions were a direct correlation of how he treated me. Eventually the emotional connection was lost forever.

I truly appreciated the interaction with your mom's boyfriend, it was a simple gesture yet it disarmed you enough to see him as an asset to your mother. My experience between my son and ex-husband was very different. They met when my son was two years old, I didn't see it then but my ex-husband was very jealous and competitive with my son. My stepdaughter was trained to dislike me from the beginning. No matter what I tried she rebelled against me.

This takes me to a point I would love for Mr. LeMay to expand on is outside influencers. When a man continues to put his first family (mother, father, siblings) In front of his new family.   

I could go on and on yet I will leave that to the author. Thank you for writing this book and bearing your soul. It's too late for me but hopefully you can reach others before it's too late


Lesley-Ann Does

5.0 out of 5 stars Could not put it down

Reviewed in the United States on February 19, 2024

At first I though this book was addressed only to men. But got curious and decided to peruse a few pages. I could not put it down until I was done. One of the Most striking things about this book was the honesty of the author. LeMay's shortfalls remind us the readers that we all execute poor judgement sometimes, and no one is immune to divorce. Through his eyes and revelation, I was granted a peek into the possibility of the challenges my ex-husband faced in our marriage, and how I may have contributed to some of them. I also identified with his co-author, as I could feel her pain through those pages, because once upon a time, they were also mine. The neglect, the desire to be loved the way my ex-husband once loved me, and not understanding why he changed, why he was no longer the man I married.

The most eye opening and uplifting moments in the book for me is chapter 8 Help mate. God put both male and female here not only for the purpose of reproduction, but so we can also complement each other. And yes sometimes it's as simple as scratching that itch in the part of his back that he is unable to reach, or him rubbing your feet after a long day of chasing after dementia patients on the geri psych unit. We all need this book, even if you are at the euphoric stage of your marriage. It will serve as a reminder and a guide, as to what is needed to maintain a beautiful and lasting marriage not only in the black family, but in all marriages.


5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Read

Reviewed in the United States on September 17, 2023

For me this publication hit home. Chapter after Chapter it gave me the realization that I wasn't alone in my feelings. For me as a women I know I'm the backbone and it's my job to encourage my mate through think and thin. This publication is the blueprint on a long lasting marriage. If your at a crossroad please do yourself a favor and purchase the book. I promise you'll find the clarity you need.


5.0 out of 5 stars Thoroughly Engaging

Reviewed in the United States on January 24, 2023

I wasn't sure what to think of the book just at first glance. I'm not married and I didn't think I would be able to relate. But I was completely wrong. The author makes it clear at the start that the book is based off what he's learned from going through divorce. Then he adds in not only his very personal and private stories but also anecdotes and stories from relevant historical, religious, and cultural resources. All of which made for such an engaging and well rounded book. You can feel the regret and heart of the author that has truly reflected on past behaviors and dissected them and relived them in order to become a better person for people around him. All the points made are such good advice many of which you can take towards any close relationships not just marriage. I'm glad I read it and I would definitely recommend to anyone facing struggles in their marriage.

Hope Anderson

4.0 out of 5 stars Loved it!

Reviewed in the United States on December 22, 2020

Mr. LeMay's book is one of courage - the courage to be transparent and to acknowledge past mistakes along with providing the knowledge of how to avoid the mistakes made in a marriage; his passion for wanting to share the knowledge the creator has given him is undeniable. A must read and a must have in your self-help library. Kudos to Mr. LeMay!

B. Williams-motley

5.0 out of 5 stars Exceptional, Knowledgeable Avoiding Divorce: 101. For Black Men Book

Reviewed in the United States on October 16, 2022

Avoiding Divorce: 101. For Black Men. By Michael LeMay, this book is a grabber, and once one begins to read it, it’s not a book; one can stop reading midway and not finish. The author has gained significant knowledge from his personal experience of how divorce affects the family unit negatively, especially the African American family. The main thing that motivated me to read the book in it entirely was the author’s transparency, how he exposed his negative behavior within his marriage and how it caused the destruction of his marriage; I salute Mr. LeMay for being transparent; that’s a massive step as African American black man. The book is an exception reader for those considering remarriage and those singles who have never been married but are in preparation.

The title can be a little trickery because it appears that the author’s audience is the black man, but that is misleading because, reading the book, he broke down the importance of the wife’s role in the marriage relationship; it was very captivating. I appreciate the emphasis he placed on the significance of complimenting one’s spouse, making time to connect with one’s spouse daily, spending time together, maintaining open communication, and doing things together as a couple to keep a healthy, vibrant, long-lasting marriage.

I would recommend Avoiding Divorce: 101 for Black Men by Michael LeMay. If I had to rate this book, I would rate it a ten.


Miss Williams

5.0 out of 5 stars Great book for men & the women who love them!

Reviewed in the United States on November 19, 2022

This book should be required reading for men who are struggling to find their way to peace & security within their marriages and within themselves.

The author courageously lays himself bare to illustrate the behaviors that will lead you to an emotional and physical divide within your union as well as divorce. The corrective behaviors outlined in this insightful book will assist you in developing a stronger connection with your mate.

Each module contains personal reflections aligned with that sections teachings which prove the author is not just talking the talk but has done the work to walk the walk.

The book also includes the woman’s perspective on how negative behaviors can impact trust, desire and love for our spouses.

This book is a great resource for couples struggling in their marriages or those who want to connect on a deeper level to avoid the struggles.
Very enlightening read!


5.0 out of 5 stars Real talk!

Reviewed in the United States on July 7, 2020

I enjoyed reading this book! Even though the title implies for Black Men, it is not just for men alone. The spotlight is put on the high rate of divorce in the black community, the negative generational effects caused when a marriage is dissolved so quickly; in most cases without adequate council, and the advantages of maintaining the African American family as a unit. The author and co-authors words are succinct and to the point! Each module takes you on a journey and illustrates step by step the affects of divorce, and the economic impact. It also highlights and defines the importance of the women’s role in a marriage (which I could definitely relate to), and the long term effects in maintaining a strong family relationship. A very powerful read!

2 people found this helpful

Kindle Customer

5.0 out of 5 stars LeMay lays out the blueprint for marital harmony!

Reviewed in the United States on July 4, 2020

As a woman reading this I felt like the proverbial fly on the wall. Michael Le May goes after the roots of the cancer of divorce. I found it both heartbreaking and inspirational. With every word the author reveals his love for the Black family, and his genuine desire to help others avoid the pain he has experienced. His male point of view is a must read for young Black men. Mr. LeMay gives you the plain talk that so many men need. Avoiding Divorce 101 is a fatherly explanation of what to do when you find your wife. LeMay like a father or brother tells you how to lead your family away from the pitfalls of relationships and divorce.


5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing transformation!!!

Reviewed in the United States on March 21, 2021

Reading this book demonstrates that the author has and continues to do the WORK! It takes a tremendous amount of courage for one to self-reflect and take accountability/responsibility for their contribution to the breakdown., and he has addressed every area where a breakdown is possible.

Awesome self-help book that would enlighten, provoke thought and ultimately action! Looking in the mirror is difficult, and this book reflects the hurt, pain and wounds divorce brings. Definitely a conduit to healing for our Black men, forcing them to look at themselves, know what accountability and ownership looks like, and take back their positions in the family unit. Love it!!!

Amazon Customer

5.0 out of 5 stars Insightful.

Reviewed in the United States on July 28, 2020

Michael Lemay, you told it like it really is. No one is a mind reader and when women feel taken for granted we do withdraw. Being in an interracial relationship gave me great insight into what my guy is sometimes thinking. You're honesty about your mistakes, and your truths will be a great value to anyone who reads this book. In these troubling times I felt faith renewed. I think it's a book everyone should read even before you are married so you can follow the good advice on how to stay married. Best of luck to you. Thank you for sharing your life experiences.

Akinyi Gaya

5.0 out of 5 stars The Do's and don't in a marriage

Reviewed in the United States on July 24, 2020

The author has used his experience as a teaching, to help us avoid the mistakes he made, and a lot of what goes on in relationships and marriages. Major issues that affect marriages like communication, sex, romance, finances just to mention a few.
The highlight for me was how he analyzed how your wife should be your help-mate.

Robert P.

5.0 out of 5 stars Insightful!

Reviewed in the United States on February 2, 2020

Insightful novel for black men of all ages. Author uses his own life experiences to illustrate theories why some black men potentially behave the way they do. Novel encourages the reader to look deep into their past to understand who they really are and who they want to be, providing the foundation to become more successful in dealing with all life situations.

One person found this helpful

Nikki Overstreet

5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing read !

Reviewed in the United States on August 31, 2020

I love this book. It’s an awesome read for everyone. If you haven’t read this yet, seriously what are you waiting for! It’s very informative and extremely helpful. Do yourself a favor and get this book!

Charles A. West

4.0 out of 5 stars A Better Life

Reviewed in the United States on February 7, 2020

LeMay offers valuable insights from his own experiences and other experts he consulted. Investing a little time in digesting his book could pay huge dividends for many men.

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